20 things the new mother books dont tell you!

Thursday, 20 August 2015

Becoming a new parent can seem daunting and as much as we try to prepare ourselves beforehand, there is stuff that the textbooks leave out. Stuff that other parents leave out. So, like many before me, I thought I would create a post un-sugar coating motherhood so that you know what you've really got yourself into.

1. Lightening pains. 
These bad boys are called lightening for a reason because that's exactly what those 'up the foo foo daggers', really feel like!

2. Post partum poo
If you find the thought of pushing a baby out scary. Wait until you get the urge to push your first post partum poo out of a freshly stitched up area! .. I will add its the fear of it that's that worst, eat your fibre and hold a clean sanitary towel against the area and you will be fine!

3. Sitting with your boobs out
If you choose to breastfeed sitting with your boobs out will become 'the norm' for the first few weeks. You'll become a semi-nudist because, if you haven't got a baby attached to them, you'll be getting some fresh air to a layer on Lansinoh and having some supply boosting skin to skin.

4. Showering will become a luxury
I know how absurd that sounds. At first you will manage it, your other half will let you have long soaks to soothe your stiches out of sympathy, but give it a week and your exhaustion will kick in and as soon as your little one is asleep you will be crawling into bed, not the shower!

5. And when you do get the time to shower
don't expect to do it alone. You'll find yourself dragging the bouncer in the bathroom with you out of desperation. But pretty soon that baby will turn into a toddler throwing toys into your bath so that they can play over the side. You know how they tell you 'you'll never pee alone again', well the same goes for bathing! Toilet roll getting unrolled may be cute on the Andrex advert, but in real life it's a pain in the ass!

6. The "you look amazing, have you really just had a baby" compliments
Unless your one of those lucky few that do actually bounce straight back, id say this is an empty compliment or your doing well to not look like your death! ... Put it this way, on the way out of the hospital the receptionist asked if I was checking in or leaving.. I have never been so mortified! I never really thought much about my stomach after bearing the child. I'm not na├»ve, I knew it wouldn't be the same, but I didn't expect to touch it by accident and suddenly have an omg moment! You know on Santa Claus the movie where Patch writes Santa's belly "shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly"? That's exactly what it does. I actually spent the first night in hospital giggling away with Craig then telling him to stop making me laugh because it wobbled everywhere!

7. You'll have two choices
Eat your food cold after everyone else, or share it with your child. No meal is ever truly 'just yours' again. Eating out alone or during a nap is heaven and so underrated!

8. Forget music charts
The only songs that will be stuck in your head any time soon are nursery rhymes or theme tunes. You'll find yourself singing and hoovering along to "special delivery service" and if your lucky, might even catch your other half in on the action too. I can remember turning my head at neck snapping speeds in the car when Craig was humming along to something or other! ..And thinking "Oh god, we really are parents!"

9. You'll wash the same load  of clothes three times
because you keep forgetting to peg it out before bed. This is where your going overboard on the clothe buying actually comes in handy.. because as quickly as you've washed one load, they've created another.

10. Silence is no longer bliss
Silence, unless at bedtime, is suspicious. Shout "What are you doing?" and get in there as fast as you can!

11. Your own clothes however, will never be clean again!
You'll glance down at your jeans in public and realise that they are covered in baby food..oh god, you hope its food! You'll then put them on again the next day after giving them a quick once over with a baby wipe.

12. Baby wipes don't just wipe the baby
they clean everything, including the bathroom in a hurry!

13. The only thing you will ever see on your TV again is cbeebies
or some equally soul destroying programme! You'll resort to downloading the ITV player app on your phone just to catch up with Emmerdale!

14. After birth pains
Oh yes, as if giving birth wasn't enough you then have to deal with pain whilst your womb is going back. You'll question whether there is actually another baby in there because jeez louise it feels like is!

15. Post partum bleeding
..think 9 months worth of periods and you'll still not be close. You know those ugly gigantic maternity pads? Well you will need to wear at least two of those at once! Don't be alarmed at leaving you own crime scene on the walk from the delivery bed to the shower!

16. You'll cry
They inform you that you might get the baby blues and cry a few days after having a baby. But they don't tell you that said crying will be over the most ridiculous things, or nothing at all! With Rio I sat in the bath and sobbed for no  reason. With Niall I broke down in hysterics because Craig wanted to buy the breast pump from a different store to me!

17. Your nipples might bleed
I'm not talking cracked, slight blood due to soreness. I'm talking sat pumping away happy as larry only to look down and realise you've been pumping blood horror movie type shit!

18. You will wake up
One of the most common things I hear is women worrying that they wont wake up when their baby needs them. Three years later I can still hear Rio sneeze three doors down the hall! You WILL wake up. Your other half might not, and even if he does will pretend he is asleep no matter how much you nudge kick him!

19. Thongs and Tampax
will be saved for special occasions and swimming. Comfort is key down there now!

20. People will have an unwanted opinion about your name choice
..in fact about everything. But if you have an opinion back then your wrong, its your baby, what do you know anyway?? And no matter how much you dress them in head to toe pink/blue someone will think that they are the opposite gender!



I'm sure that I don't have to note that this post is written in jest and is just light hearted fun but I will anyway. Pregnancy, birth, and motherhood is the most magical thing in the world and you should enter it with a clear untainted mind. You will learn your way as you go along, some of these might occur, some of them might not. But when you look at your child you really wont care either way.
 

Walking in the wild!

Monday, 17 August 2015

Niall took his steps a few months ago. At first he slipped back into crawling again and for a few weeks didn't really progress. Then one day there was no stopping him.

He's mastered the house so we thought it was time to take him out into the great outdoors. He's still a bit clumsy in his shoes so we took him back to basics to get a feel of the ground underfoot. And this was the adorable outcome...


Clumber park is one of our all time favourite places to go. We had intended to spend half of the day on a family bike ride but the prices doubled to have Niall in a seat behind us and for us that defeated the point. We love this location because its an amazing family day out without breaking the bank. But adding bikes the mix would bring the total to over £50 and with a zoo visit planned the next day it just wasn't sensible. Me and Craig are possibly planning on coming back and doing it for a 'date day', just for old times sake though!

Where is your 'go to', family day out destination?

One of those maze days!

Friday, 14 August 2015

We decided to make the most of a sunny Saturday and head down to a local maize maze/farm. Rio unexpectedly got to bottle feed a baby piglet and Niall was in his element on the bouncy castle.

 I'm making it my aim to document more and with vlogging  becoming the norm, even on Facebook, it's more doable than ever. I by no means have my eyes set on becoming anything fancy but I do like the idea of having a platform that I can  upload to when I feel the urge. Words and pictures say a lot but capturing a memory on video is something else! 

In the middle of the chaos..

Friday, 7 August 2015

Myself and my two sisters each have two children. My parents have six grandchildren, the oldest is currently eight. So I think it goes without saying that when we all meet up at once, thing can get a little chaotic. But give them an open space together and that chaos dissolves, slightly, just enough to find yourself smiling at the new generations of our family.


















 

Creating Dinosaur Land!

Thursday, 23 July 2015

It's the school holidays. Technically this doesn't apply to Rio, but seems as though he starts Nursery in September, I thought we would pack the time full of extra fun days anyway while we have still got the chance. Like most parenting households, we have baskets and cupboards jam packed with toys. Most of which don't get half as much use as they should! So I'm making it my mission to change that.

Today I took a handful of Dinosaurs out of 'the Dinosaur basket', and ventured out into the garden. Rio was clueless to what the hell I was doing as I was also armed with a baking tray! It was then that I showed him a 'Dinosaur Land', example on Pinterest and his eyes lit up. He got to work fetching mud, stones, grass and a coconut shell (for the water hole). I couldn't stop smiling watching him. At one point he even ran back indoors for a toilet roll tube (craft must have!).










Before long he was too eager to create anymore, he wanted to get stuck in and play and that's when I realised that imagination is everything.







"The little one cant reach"..puts on silly voice.."Hop on my back little Dinosaur"


  "Is this one a plant eater?".. Doesn't wait to response.."He must be, nom nom nom"


 He's always loved playing pretend kitchens, doctors, shops, but for me this showed how little toys children actually need. Most of what we used to today was found around the house/garden. His imagination went into over drive. He surprised me so many times as he talked away to himself. I sat there one the grass, with Niall, realising how much Rio has grown up. And how much, despite my fears, he is ready for school!
 

Mini break adventure!

Sunday, 19 July 2015

Work life has been pretty hectic this week but we managed to fit in a mini break to the Lake District that really did make all the difference.

We didn't get off to the best of starts. Our directions led us thirty minutes in the wrong direction, which is bad enough without two young children in the back. In true toddler style Rio was asking if we were nearly there and Niall..well Niall was screaming blue murder! Luckily I'm tiny so had squeezed in between the two car seats and managed to get them to sleep. We spent 4hr47 minutes travelling in the end, which could of easily have been more given that our gps signal vanished and soon after our phone battery. Speaking of phones, I also smashed my IPhone screen that morning.

But anyhow.. we had finally reached our destination and boy was it worth it!


The photo above has been added to my all times favourites. The ones that instantly bring back a memory! I was being a typical 'Mum' and forbidding Craig to even attempt to climb on carrying Niall but he did regardless, much to Rio's delight!














Despite the first day being full of showers we tried our hardest to make the most of it. The next day was a lot brighter but we didn't capture any of it. Instead we spent the day walking and trying to teach Rio how to skim stones.

Country Kids from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall

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